Feels of My Soul

And unlike many other people in this world. I am still awake by this part of the night bewildered and baffled by the numerous mystified ‘ifs’ and ‘whys’ to comfort my dismayed soul.

I am not sad upon why the other multitudes are gathering their conscience in their sleep. I don’t even care about being sad upon why I feel so low at every spot of motion in this world. I don’t even give a thought to people’s responses and reactions to the sadness that had stroked me deep inside this little fanatic heart of mine.

But, do they not have unfinished thoughts?
Do they not despair incomplete job that needed to be done by their bedtime?

Of course, they do.

You know, as a little despondent of this human race, I had always tried to be ‘true to myself’.
And, “I failed” a lot of those times.
But, “I’m still alive.”

They called me on a colorless life. But, they never knew what all black can do.

I lived my life to be stern with the black.

I always loved black attires though as a child I fared to be very fair.

My mother had taught me things that I still remember. Things that no other women would ever have called me upon.

But, since the day I left her, I have never found solace in any other face I had ever had a look of.

Many of those who promised to live a moment of life more than mine, just in case I don’t find myself lying alone to be let quenched to the arms of  death, are not a part of my life anymore. Maybe because I am already dead for them.

Many of those who targeted to respect me for the sympathy I deserved are run down by the ideas of my silence to one of arrogance.

The descend, but, was in me alone and not the people I had met.

They had every right to be their best and make me feel my worst, because that’s exactly how I deserved to be treated. If they had thought otherwise, I’d have vey much doubted that.

There’s nothing the world would do good to me except bring me an essence of eternal darkness_The Black.

But, somewhere I still believe that there will be a light somewhere near.

Because the shadow is caused only by the light.

And, “The Black needs the White”

_Saiz