Secrets of My Diary: #36. My heart craves to see you shine.

“One of the signs of the greatest strength is to actually keep the pain inside and win battalions of hopes against your demons fighting back at you.

Silently. Secretly. And sumptuously.

Because sometimes some things must remain between us and the Lord of the Heavens. That is why I crave to see your heart shine. Because that is where He dwells within us.

I always believed that the heart is never empty. It is either filled with love of and for people or the hatred at the helm.

And God is a symbol of Love. Just like we can’t collect water and fire at one place, similarly, we can’t conjoin the love of this world the Love of the Lord of all the Worlds at one place.
It’s either God or opposite of God.
It’s either this end or the far end.
It’s either Heaven or Hell.

To read my previous post about importance of love. Click here: I dream of Love

Two choice: To be or Not to be.
Two choices: To be? Or not to be.

I am a spiritual person. Not because I needed to believe in someone more than myself to imbibe hope within my heart galloping from my lips. But, because I am certain that my existence is not for just. I, along with all the billions alive on this planet are as important.
Because death doesn’t suffice my purpose of existence.

Every night before going to bed, I ask myself the same question over and over again, “Why did I chose to be called a ‘Writer’ by myself?”

“Is it only because I think I am one?”

“Or is it because I’d been loved a lot?”

“Or is it because I’d chosen to give love, in return of nothing at all?”

I remember my days. Those days when I always thought myself as a fantast. I spoke less to people. And I spoke less about people even. But, I heard people talking about me each and every day as I walked in that arena over and over again. I used to hear different articulated words each and every time. Some of goodness and some of the ill-fated.

Still wondering what does fantast mean? Ha ah.w
You’d have to scroll to the end to learn about it. Now don’t scroll to it.
I understand your excitement but before that you need to understand my feeling first.

I always wondered if this is how being loved feels like. I found no answer in any form. That one is loved and hated at the same time. That the reasons for some to love might become the reasons for some to hate.

Relentless, I chose to get back to myself. To the confidence that was lost behind. And to the days from the vault. And that is how I reflect upon myself as a personal memorandum of my existence.

The sky contains the secrets of the life above and below it.
The sky contains the secrets of this life above and below it.

On the right is me standing exactly where I stood three months back looking at the same sky to find out something new in it.

Trying to renew the same feeling is also a reason. Maybe.

On the left is what I am actually trying to see through. Sometimes it’s not about what you see. Rather, it’s about what you want to see.

Likewise if I am looking at you, I am not actually looking at you. I look for your soul and all the rights and wrongs. And how can those things get better with time.

Does that make me a narcissist?
Well even if it does, does that lessen your value or increase it?

One’s opinion matters. But, not every opinion matter.

I often hear this term from people around me that I advice them much and doesn’t let them speak much.

I have only one clear answer for them,

“If I won’t, somebody else will. And not everyone knows you as I know. So, before people find better of you, be the person you should be. And speak, whatever you should. But, don’t disregard yourself by showing disrespect towards me. Because it might not matter to me. But it will, to you, after you find out how wrong you were at that point in time when you refused to believe me.


Fantast is the word for writers.
Fantast is the word for writers.

To connect with me through social media personally.
I have placed the icons on the right side of this page.
No, not to appreciate, but, to be appreciated if you feel down.
Open to all.

Another important announcement is that I have  recently starting guest blogging  on my blog. A gentleman who  writes Urdu Poetry with Adab asked me a week ago  if I accept guest blogs. That was when this idea got struck in my  head.
This will promote your goodness and eventually spread Love  over Hatred around ourselves.
Change starts  from around us. Right?

And I accept blog posts on
Personal Development,
Urdu Poetry,
English Poetry,

And no promotional or branding stuffs.
Art is Art. Accepted. And Decorated too.

(: Thank  You very Much. Love to You. πŸ™‚

28 thoughts on “Secrets of My Diary: #36. My heart craves to see you shine.

Add yours

        1. Been good Al’hamdulil’lah
          You should start with poetry then.
          like the ones where you’d mention it’s about your friend when in actual it were about you. haha πŸ˜‰

          Liked by 1 person

  1. Wow! This is nice, glad to have discovered your blog. It’s always nice to come across a male writer who is comfortable enough to write about his feelings. Your writing reminds me of this book, The Alchemist, if you haven’t read it, please do. You’ll love it.


    1. Jazak’Allah
      I surely would read now. He’s a great writer afterall.
      Thank you very much for your time. I’m glad you found something worthy on my blog.
      Hope to see you around.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Hey Saiz, thank you for the support you’ve given for my previous blog: Playing with words and I’m coming up with it’s site now expecting the same support. I am working on my new website and coming up readily with it this month. I would be glad if you be my guest writer. You will be given full credits of your work and I’ll send you link showing up your post under your name on my website once I finish setting up my site. My categories are: Short story, poetry, any real life incident or story, technology or lifestyle article. You can mail me at if interested. Expecting an early response. Happy new year. Stay blessed. Keep writing. Have a nice day πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Saiz!
    This is the first thing I’ve read from you in so long….and it was quite refreshing a read.
    …I wish I could submit posts to you, it would be such an honor to guest post on your blog, but lol, I haven’t done poetry in so long… I’ll really have to push myself to it…


    1. It’s a delight to see your comment. Always.
      Do write one that outclasses each and every damn poetry, and that rips people apart; and send it to me for the honour would be mine to take then.
      I’ve been good. Al’hamduli’lah.
      How’s it going with you there?

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Wow, Saiz, with a lines as motivating as those, I definitely will, inshaAllah. πŸ˜€
        And yes, Alhamdulillah, I’ve been grand… But I’m about to get even more busy now (if that’s even possible) cause I’m starting my internship from 2nd Jan… Then there’s classes too…
        Pray I manage it….


  4. The moment o read the fantast, I made a mental note to google it the first thing after I read your post to the very end πŸ™‚
    Funny how you saved me from google πŸ™‚
    Always nice to read your uplifting, inspirational, as well as thought provoking words. Welldone writer πŸ™‚


  5. Enjoyed reading even the announcement, I found it one of the best posts on your blog and this ‘And God is a symbol of Love…… It’s either Heaven or Hell.’ Touched the deepest core of heart ~


    1. Haha. So you noticed the announcement well I suppose.
      I feel very fond of myself after being appreciated for writing something worthy that touches people. I always want to strike their hearts. So, that it may bring a change. If not in their lives, then at least in mine first.
      And that’s all with me. πŸ™‚

      And yep, you can contact for Guest Blogging too. Open for all. Anytime.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. That is so nice of you and regarding Guest Blogging yes, I would surely love to think about it , it’s a pretty nice idea . Thanks mate ✌


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